


Day 1-5

by ColorfulStabwound



Series: Drarry Dump [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drarry, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-13
Updated: 2012-06-13
Packaged: 2018-02-13 22:28:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2167539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ColorfulStabwound/pseuds/ColorfulStabwound
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five short days can seem like a lifetime.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Day 1-5

**Day 1**

When you are prepared for something, does it make it any easier to face?

I’m partial to believing not, these are just little lies we tell ourselves to help lessen the pain.  I will be the first one to tell you how selfish I am, I am a narcissist by nature, I own it. Believe it. So it should come as no great surprise that I have a hard time when things that I deem as my own, are taken away.  I know that this has to happen, that doesn’t mean I have to accept it. Subtlety has never been my strong suit. My day has passed much like every other day before this, with the exception of one important piece.  Friends and stalkers can only take your mind off the matter at hand for so long.  When the world is sleeping and you feel like you want to drop from exhaustion, what do you do?  Where do you seek solace when you think no one is watching you?  How do you comfort yourself when all you really want is what you cannot have?

It didn’t take me long to realize I couldn’t stay at the Manor, I think I had already made that decision before I’d ever arrived.  It was easier at his home, there were no reminders and no eyes, I could walk around starkers if that is what I wished, and I did. Eating cold cereal from a bowl while standing in his kitchen, smug satisfaction pinning itself to my face as I purposely leaned against the counter. I read his paper and fiddled with his silly muggle telly, not really understanding it but finding an odd fascination from the pictures that were inside of it.  It was late, later than it should have been and I knew that it was futile to wait, but a tiny part of me refused to give in. I played to win, after all. Eventually I found my way into his bed, wrapped myself in his blankets and eventually drifted off to sleep.  I wouldn’t hear him come in, nor would I feel him as he pressed his dampened body against mine, but I would know.

And it would get me through another day..

 

**Day 2**

This day has passed far less seamlessly than the last, the void is becoming more pronounced, and it’s only been two.  I’d like to think I can do this alone, I’m a fucking Malfoy, I don’t need anyone; I’d be lying to myself. I need so much..

Work was dismal, at best. I couldn’t be bothered with it, refused to concentrate on anything that didn’t involve lying back in my chair and staring out the window. I feel mildly pathetic at the moment, but at least no one is around to see it. It’s a small relief.  Eventually I am forced to do some actual work, my assistant is practically glued to my side and watching me like a hawk. Merlin I adore her at times.

By the time I let myself into his home I’m exhausted, and I haven’t anything to really show for it.  I spend a bit more time with the muggle telly tonight, pressing the buttons on the little square device that makes it work. I forget what he called it now.  Eventually I settle on a show about a Doctor who isn’t really a Doctor. He lives in a funny blue box and says the most amusing things. I don’t know when it happened, or even how, but somewhere along the way I got really attached to this.  I could never say it out loud, but there it is. I wanted to crawl in his bed again and disappear beneath the duvet, but I resisted. The thought of waking up alone again was almost as unpleasant as the idea that I could simply go back to the Manor.

This better get easier, I’ve still got three days to go..

I don’t know when I drifted to sleep but I did, half-lying on the couch still in my work clothes, telly flashing images and casting shadows against my lidded eyes.  I dreamt he was there again, leading me to bed and tenderly helping me out of my suit. The curve of his body against mine felt so real and I sighed softly, content.  I know I’m waking up alone again, but for now, let me have my dreams..

 

**Day 3**

I am convinced time is working against, me that bitch.  How is it that I’m putting my third day to bed and somehow feel like I’m moving backwards, not forward?  I know it is nothing more than my childish mind playing cruel tricks on me; perhaps I need to find a proper outlet for such things.

Today was dreadful. Work was a disaster, nothing went right. My assistant actually sent me home. I fought with Theodore simply because I felt like picking a fight; I even skipped dinner with mum at the manor.  Now I’m standing in your kitchen again, leaning against your counter and eating cereal out of one of your bowls. I’m feeling sorry for myself and it’s irritating the fuck out of me. I abandon the kitchen and ignore the telly, instead opting for the bathroom. I stand under the water for I don’t know how long, steaming torrents pouring over my head as my thoughts drift elsewhere. Fingertips brush against the cool smoothness of the tile, a smile curving my mouth, remembering you here; pressed up against those tiles, soaking wet with my name on your lips. A soft sigh escapes me and my eyes slide closed, consumed with the memory of exactly how you looked. The way pieces of wet hair hung limply over your eyes, the bruised fullness of your mouth.  Perfection.

I’m in your bed now, sated; skin still damp and a crimson blush on my cheeks.  For a long time I simply stare at the ceiling in the darkness, pondering where you are or what you are doing. I tell myself that tomorrow will be better, and I almost believe it.  I miss you..

 

**Day 4**

Do you want to know what I see when I dream?

I see sunlight filtering through thick tree branches that sway softly in an afternoon breeze. I see your face above mine, partially shadowed but somehow still impossibly bright.  I hear your voice in my ear, telling me you love me, and I believe you.  I taste the welcoming bitterness of a perfect glass of iced coffee on my tongue.  I feel the numb of ice against the back of my teeth, and I see myself smile as I carefully glide that very piece of ice across your bare chest.  These are my dreams, and I am thankful for them.

The sunlight is suddenly blinding and I’m squinting, holding up my hand to shield my eyes from its intensity. You’re backing slowly away, telling me you’re sorry with words that never reach my ears. I call your name and reach for you, arm outstretched and fingers splayed; just stay a little longer.  Your hand reaches towards mine and I force my fingers out towards you, determined to feel your touch. You smile and look right through me with a gaze that is oddly comforting.  And just as our fingertips graze one another, it’s all gone.

The light on my face is not sun, it is your patronus, telling me things I don’t want to hear and using your voice to do it.  I watch it through bleary eyes, half sitting up in your bed, hair impossibly mussed.  It starts to fade and I reach for it, fingertips once again grazing a piece of you that isn’t quite real.  I am alone, and it hurts.

An owl comes from Theodore, beckoning me out from my self-imposed exile.  I can’t help but smile at his cheek; if I didn’t adore him I would have killed him by now. I’m leaving work early to meet him, silently cursing myself for being so god damned pathetic. If you don’t hurry back, I’ll be out of a job. I enter the pub Theodore’s requested my presence at, thankful for the dim lighting and the obnoxiously loud music. It would make it easier to avoid awkward conversation, but I’m guessing that was precisely why he’d chosen this place in the first place.  Like most people in my life, he’s too good to me. Someday maybe I’ll even tell him so.

I’ve had one too many drinks, Theodore is leading me out the door and telling me he’s taking me home, I turn a sloppy frown on him.  “Not the Manor.”  I murmur in his ear, head resting heavily against his and hoping he understands.  He sees me back to your home and I hug him fondly when we arrive; I will conveniently blame this act on the liquor tomorrow, but for now I am thankful he is here. He helps me out of my suit and into your bed and I smile a bit sadly at him, asking him if I was insane.  He laughs and kindly informs me that yes, I am completely bonkers but it is part of my charm.  He presses a kiss to my forehead before he leaves and when I am once again alone I sigh softly and bury my face in your neglected pillow, eventually drifting off.

Another day done..

 

**Day 5**

The alcohol dulled my mind and made it heavy enough that it kept the dreams locked out, funny thing about dreams though; they always find a way in..

A soft brush against my cheek, a feather light ghosting against my lips; the gentle prickle of stubble against my chest. I was lost in a familiar dream again, chasing you around my subconscious, so determined to catch up to you. And I did; when your lips made contact with mine I didn’t try and hide the soft whimper that escaped me, this dream was different; I had yet to figure out why.

I was squinting again, sunlight filtering through a crack in the curtains. And I was warm; impossibly warm. A small groan escaped me and as I reached up to press the pads of my thumb and forefinger into my still-lidded eyes, I realized I wasn’t alone.

Shit.

Panic hit me hard in the chest and my eyes flew open, the pain that shot through my skull instantly rendered me helpless and I groaned again. I was gripped with a terror that I’ve never experienced before and just as I was about to lose it the sound of your voice broke the silence and shattered my resolve.

You were here.

“Potter?”

I forced my eyes open and lifted my head, squinting bleary eyes down at your impossibly smiling face.  “Am I still asleep?” I knew I sounded like a bloody idiot but I was mildly hung over and utterly confused. I was totally and completely dumbstruck for about twelve seconds before I reacted, realizing that no, I was not dreaming, and yes you were truly here. 

In an instant I was up, turning our tables and pinning you to the bed. I ignored the dull thud in my head or the impossible state my hair must be in, it was all secondary.  I slide one of my legs over your middle, easily straddling you and perching comfortably there, eyes trained on you curiously. “Don’t ever do that to me again.” I reply simply, considering you for a moment or two more before leaning down over you, mouth pressed gently over yours.  There was so much I couldn’t say; wouldn’t say. I poured those things into that kiss, it was slow and searching, moving at its own pace as I reacquainted myself with all the parts of you I’d missed terribly. When my chest seized from lack of oxygen I pulled back, eyes still fixed on you.  I noted the dark circles beneath your eyes and the weary look about you; I really had no concept of what you’d left me to do. You looked so impossibly perfect pressed into the pillows beneath me I had to smile, another chaste kiss pressed to your mouth before I sat up once more. “So..You’re back?”  I asked quietly, head tilting slightly with the question. I hated ruining the moment with words, but I had to know. I *needed* to know.  The smile that you flashed pained me and stole my breath and I might not have realized it at that particular moment, but it shifted something inside of me.

“I missed you terribly.”

I murmur, leaning over you and pressing a soft kiss against your shoulder. The breath that escapes you pulls a smile from me and I follow the kiss with an entire trail of them, littered across your collarbone and down your chest. I’m determined to rekindle my relationship with every inch of you, my mouth takes care with every expanse of flesh it comes in contact with, tongue gliding gently over every surface followed by lips, and sometimes teeth.  “So much,” I murmur against your navel, pausing to cast a glance up at you before continuing my plight, determined to show you exactly how much.   
All afternoon if necessary.


End file.
